2023 offers a fresh start on discovering new self care practices. With the stress of the holidays over, January offers time to reflect, slow down and get mindful. But mindful masturbation?Those two words can be perplexing. So, let’s break it down. Mindful Masturbation is the practice of being present in the physical, emotional, psychological and erotic processes in your body. It is a process that allows you to feel your body’s full erotic potential – the best part is, anyone can do it!
You don’t need a partner to practice sexual mindfulness, sometimes it’s even more useful to start a regular practice on your own. You can do this by dedicating time and space to self-pleasure free from goals or stimuli, feeling for sensation from head to toe with no rush or agenda. Read on as I answer the most common questions I’m asked about mindful masturbation.
Where does the practice mindful masturbation come from?
Popularity in mindful masturbation practices has formed from a dramatic rise in engagement with yoga, tantra and meditation. The Western world now has scientific evidence to prove the benefits of Eastern traditions, this proof has encouraged people to start engaging their bodies in mindful practices, and they’re feeling the benefits. For the first time human beings are able to look inside the body and brain on a neurological level, we can now see how practices like yoga, meditation, mindful masturbation and mindful sex impact our body and how it shapes brain development and the nervous system.
What is it?
Mindful Masturbation is an intimate and transformative practice. You move as if you are with a lover, seduce yourself, squeeze your body, slip your clothes off, pull, push and caress yourself. It does not involve traditional yoga or meditation – but it does encourage the practices of conscious breath, movement, sound, touch, dance, placement of attention and intentions to weave into your self-pleasuring practices. It’s not about how flexible or orgasmic you are, Mindful Masturbation is not goal driven. The intention is to connect to pleasure free from goals or stimuli, whilst exploring your body from head to toe with no rush or agenda.
How do I actually do mindful masturbation?
See below for an example mindful masturbation practice:
- Session structure: Every practice includes a clear beginning and ending time (it may be useful to set a timer). It has a loose session structure and requires you to use conscious breathing patterns, self-touch, movement, sounds (sighs, moans or laughter).
- Blissful breathwork: Place two fingers on your throat, inhale and exhale deeply through your nose. Constrict the back of your throat, creating an ocean-like whispering sound.
- Engage your pelvic floor: As you exhale engage your pelvic floor, as you inhale relax it.
- Pelvic Tilts: On your inhale, tilt your hips forward, on the exhale, flow your hips back. This is like a gentle, slow hip thrust.
- Hip circles: On an inhale, circle your hips forward, on the exhale, release and circle them back. Start small and work your way up to bigger circles
- Caress your body: move your hands over your entire body, face, through your hair and intend to activate every inch with light touch. With these basic practices, start to move, breathe sound and touch yourself, follow the pleasure in your whole body.
- Include Play: You can also practice mindful masturbation with other people, sensual music or toys. Try Yoga with Nova 2.
- Integrate: make sure you integrate the experience with at least 30 seconds after your session. This could simply be a quiet moment for the last few minutes of each session.
And who knows, some of these steps may make their way into a daily practice.
It is quite common to have a reduced libido during pregnancy and after giving birth. That is absolutely human and normal. Eventually, however, the desire to be intimate returns. For some couples this desire returns sooner than it does for other people. The regular question is how long should we wait to have sex again after giving birth – and what you need to watch out for. Let’s find the answers to these questions.