Pegging – Power of the Strap On

Full frontal honesty – I’ve always wondered what it would be like to have a penis. From an armchair psychology perspective, I’m sure there’s a socio-cultural element at play. Power and penetration come to mind. Fortunately, the beauty of this curiosity and desire for anyone is the existence of the strap on dildo. And what to do with the strap on? Practice pegging, of course.

What is pegging?

The term ‘pegging’ was coined from a 2001 contest lead by sex columnist Dan Savage. He asked his readers to create a name for the act of a cis female using a strap on dildo for anal sex with a cis male partner. Out of a 12,000 reader response pool, ‘pegging’ was born. Since then pegging has gained traction in mainstream magazines and been the focus of popular TV series such as Peep Show and Broad City. Anal sex in general seems to be less stigmatized and more accepted within heteronormative circles. And let’s be thankful for that – pleasure induced states from anal play are their own kind of ecstasy.

Nowadays, the term pegging is more inclusive to mean anal penetration with a strap on dildo. All you need is one person with a consenting butt and one person ready to don a strap on dildo.

In short, pegging is available to any eager erotic explorer.

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What’s hot about pegging?

Pegging changes up the power game and status quo in sex. Wearing a strap on dildo can feel wildly empowering when coupled with being the penetrator. For those on the receiving end, getting pegged open ups new psychological and physical states of stimulation.

Physically speaking, for those with penises – being penetrated can lead to intense orgasms brought on by prostrate (p-spot) stimulation. Emotionally, penis owners might find switching up roles to be quite the turn on!

For those wearing the strap on dildo, there can be physical stimulation to the vulva from thrusting, rubbing and playing with different angles. And since the brain is arguably our biggest erogenous zone, experimenting with pegging could truly blow your mind into new pleasure paradigms.

Pegging – where to start?

As with anything regarding sex and intimacy, start with communication. If you’ve already played with anal stimulation like rimming or butt plugs, this might make pegging easier to suggest to your partner.

If you haven’t incorporated anal play yet, then rimming and butt plugs are a great place to start. Butt plugs come in many shapes and sizes, but for a starter toy – We-Vibe’s Ditto offers a gender-neutral design for anal play. This is a fantastic beginner’s toy to experiment with as its ergonomically designed, not intimidating in size and offers different intensities for playful experimentation. Just don’t forget the water-based lube!

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Treat boundaries and consent as an ongoing process. Remember, consent doesn’t just happen once, but is important to get loud and clear throughout the pegging process. If you’re the pegger, it’s your responsibility to continuously check in with your partner.

Ready to get the strap on and take the plunge?

Get down to some good old-fashioned research! I would even suggest going into your local sex shop and trying on different harness styles. Find one that fits comfortably and start with a smaller sized dildo. Spend time at home with your new appendage to get comfortable. Remember, wearing a strap on isn’t just a physical act, it’s a mood.

The person being penetrated might consider an anal douche or pre-pegging shower to feel more comfortable. But, let’s keep it real – we’re talking about butt play and there’s always the possibility of well…poop. So, relax and be realistic.

Start slow with plenty of steamy, sensual foreplay to get in the mood. Think of pegging like interval training. The process to full penetration is long and will vary depending on all involved. You may not get to full penetration the first try – and that’s okay! You can massage your partner’s perineum with just the tip, get a feel for your new ‘penis’, stroke yourself and simply practice ‘penis embodiment’.

For beginning pegging, no surprise deep thrusting! Work your penetrative moves incrementally and with an eye for your partner’s reactions. What’s their breathing like? Are they tensing up? Check in with them verbally but also observe their body language. Added bonus – learning to read your partner’s body language increases overall intimacy in relationships.

After care! Make time to talk afterwards. What felt good? Was there any moment of discomfort? What emotions came up? Think of aftercare as ongoing like consent. Processing new sexual experiences can happen over time, so make space for communication in the coming days.

And who knows…pegging might be the new pleasure portal for you!

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Author

Originally from the wilds of Oregon, Alexis Smiley Smith moved to Berlin to sow her wild writer oats. Sex tech and pleasure exploration knocked, she answered and the rest is her-story. Turn on tastes include 90's electro, terrace gardening and 'almost too ripe' peaches.